"And the number one reason Polly Whitney should be a writer . . . She likes to play with nitro-glycerin."

— David Letterman

"Authorship may be the best equipped science vessel to send out on the roiling seas of cosmic confusion in search of the answer to the eternal burning question: WHY ARE THERE PEOPLE? Whitney does a bang-up job."

— Jerry Bruckheimer

"What the hell is this supposed to mean?"

— Quentin Tarantino

"Better a library of seven million volumes and one copy of This is Graceanne's Book than a journey of a thousand miles."

— Confucius

"Whitney's writing is like turkeys mating with mosquitos."

— Dan Rather

"If you know Why There Are People, please use my email address and spill the beans: writeme@pollywhitney.com"

— Polly Whitney, who, in the interests of science, fabricated all the quotes on this page but thinks they're probably accurate — the kind of intuitive leaps typical of Sir Isaac and Wayne Newton.